Sunday, January 17, 2016

Living "Life Unfiltered"

A little less than a year ago, the phrase "Life Unfiltered" hit home more than ever before. In a lot of moments and situations, I pause to think about that phrase and how being honest, or unfiltered, would impact the power of a moment. I think about how being unfiltered affects relationships and communication.

Let's be real. Anyone who KNOWS me is not surprised that in the first few sentences I used the words relationships and communication. If anything, if you KNOW me, you're surprised it took that long for one or both to be referenced. 

It was the first week of school. Everyone is back from the winter break. Emotions are mixed. People are happy to see the 'family' they've created and been away from during the holidays. People are sad to leave their 'family' at home and go back to campus life. Anxiety over what the demands of the next semester or life after the next semester is high. Every day during the week, I was thinking about "Life Unfiltered" for a variety of reasons.  

Me. I know I'm not the best about living unfiltered. Not the best sharer of my life. Listening to others and encouraging them to be unfiltered is far more in my comfort level. (Again, don't think any of this is too surprising.) So, during the week, I took to Instagram and posted the following with a photo: 
"Everyone sees what you appear to be, few experience what you really are." ðŸŒ» Who really knows you? Have you actually let anyone experience what you really are? #foodforthought 
That was about all I could 'say' to express my thoughts during the first week. It was about all I could 'say' to express that I acknowledge I don't live all parts of my life unfiltered. There's a lot I share openly and willingly. But, I know it's enough to get by and not have to share some of the real and deep thoughts and feelings. I'll be straight up; this is not me professing that I'm about to be unfiltered with everything. But, I will say, I've become better about being unfiltered.

If I'm asked a question one-on-one with someone that's made an effort to invest in a relationship and has expressed the value of relationships, trust, honest and such in words, actions or both, I share. I don't profess from the rooftops, but I will share. And, some of my close friends have gotten those random, out-of-the-blue texts about my life and feelings. They get the unfiltered because they have invested in our relationship and they have open communcation with me. They share parts of their life with me through an unfiltered lens. 

I promise there is a point. And, you may have guessed, it all boils down to four words. Life Unfiltered. Communication. Relationships. 

Relationships are foundational to our life. Invest and engage in your relationships with others. Give of yourself. Listen. Ask questions. Have conversations. Spend time together. Enjoy others company. 

Communication happens so many ways. Engage and invest however you are comfortable. Listen to what's said and not said. Ask questions. Text. Send mail. Use social media. And after every one of those, you can insert listen and ask questions again. 

Build trust and be honest. Without these, many of us (me included) are not comfortable with sharing "Life Unfiltered" with anyone. As you build relationships and you communicate, be unfiltered. Share your highs and celebrate with others. Share your lows and accept support from others. Share the in between. And, through it all, love and let yourself be loved. 

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"Life Unfiltered" hit home with the release of stories centered around Madison Holleran. With a new semester starting and having just come back from time with family, I was thinking about "Life Unfiltered." Then, Kate Fagan's newest article on ESPNW was published. The timing was perfect and gave the reasurance and reminder that I needed. 

Split Image article by Kate Fagan
Life, Instagramed video by ESPN

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