Balance

There is constant chatter about achieving and successfully managing what others perceive as a healthy work-life balance. 


The next month will be a true test of my balance. Tomorrow afternoon I'll head home for an 11 day vacation adventure -- packing in as much family, friend time as possible into each day. After returning to work, the tentative plan is two back-to-back long weekend trips to Montana to officially become godmother to my nephew and one of my best college friend's son at their respective baptisms. Since I am not able to visit Montana often I will, of course, try to visit a lot of people along the way on those road trips. The next month will be my attempt at balancing my family values -- through in-person visits -- with my work life. That personal time will be complete overload though -- maximize people time and minimize sleep time! 


Here goes my attempt at work-life balance! I'm sure it's not what others had in mind! :)

"If you neglect to recharge a battery, it dies. And if you run full speed ahead without stopping for water, you lose momentum to finish the race." ~Oprah 

"Balance is not better time management, but better boundary management.  Balance means making choices and enjoying those choices." ~Betsy Jacobson 

"The Gift of Balance in Your Life – May you find the balance of life, time for work but also time for play.  Too much of one thing ends up creating stress that no one needs in their life." ~Catherine Pulsifer 

"You will never find time for anything.  If you want time you must make it." ~Charles Buxton 

"Find your balance and stand with it. Find your song and sing it out. Find your cadence and let it appear like a dance. Find the questions that only you know how to ask and the answers that you are content to not know." ~Mary Anne Radmacher

I Am a Benefactor of OPPORTUNITY

I am a benefactor of OPPORTUNITY. I am a benefactor of Title IX. The legislation was passed to create OPPORTUNITY in education. Athletics is an integral part of education; therefore, OPPORTUNITY has defined the evolution of sport as well. 

Because of Title IX I had the OPPORTUNITY to attend any institution of my choice and pursue the curriculum that most interested me regardless of my gender. I attended a private, catholic college that was originally founded as a all-men's institution created to create male leaders for priesthood and a handful of other male only professions. Because of the progress made in higher education, I had the OPPORTUNITY to attend Carroll College. I chose to major in business and sports management. I had the OPPORTUNITY to chose two college majors that would have never been options for females if it weren't for Title IX. The progress created by the legislation also meant I had the OPPORTUNITY to gain hands-on experience as an intern in athletics administration and financial aid. In addition, I had the OPPORTUNITY to serve on an athletics fundraising board with prominent local businessmen and businesswomen. I would not have been on a member of the fundraising board with those individuals if it was not for Title IX. 

When I completed my bachelor's I was not faced with the option of choosing a career 'suitable for a woman' or becoming a housewife. I was fortunate to have the OPPORTUNITY to attend graduate school. Likewise, I was fortunate to have the OPPORTUNITY to chose a master's curriculum that interested me regardless of my gender. I selected a program designed to develop leaders in college athletics administration focused on functioning within a higher education institution. I had the OPPORTUNITY to complete a degree in Intercollegiate Athletic Leadership; a degree that would not have been available to women (or anyone for that matter) if it were not for Title IX. Upon completion of my master's, I was again not forced to focus on what options were not available because of my gender. My options were focused on possibilities. 

Because of Title IX, I have the OPPORTUNITY to pursue a career in higher education. 

Because of Title IX, I have the OPPORTUNITY to pursue a career in athletics. 

Because of Title IX, I have the OPPORTUNITY to pursue a career in in administration.

My reality and my possibilities have been defined by Title IX. I am blessed with the OPPORTUNITY to have a career within college athletics.

My profession allows me to see countless people reap the benefits of Title IX daily. I work for an organization, a higher education institution, that encourages men and women to pursue an education in the major of their choice regardless of their gender. These students are provided an OPPORTUNITY for education. Because they are pursuing an education, those men and women are provide the OPPORTUNITY to be student-athletes, student government leaders, campus leaders and members of student organizations regardless of their gender. As we serve these students, I work with men and women in varying administration and staff positions. We are provided equal OPPORTUNITY for employment because we had the OPPORTUNITY for education and experience regardless of gender.

All of our realities and possibilities have been defined by Title IX and OPPORTUNITY. 

My hope is that everyone continues to honor and recognize the essence and purpose of the 40 year old legislation. Let us not celebrate only women's presence in higher education. Let us not celebrate only women's presence in athletics. Let us continue to celebrate OPPORTUNITY in education and athletics for everyone regardless of gender.

"Title IX was about education, opportunity and equal rights." ... "In athletics, because we’re the most visible, we set the tone. You have to see it to be it. And when there’s equality with women’s sports, and opportunities, it helps permeate everything else." ~Billie Jean King 

"Title IX is simply saying we want all kids — boys and girls — to have the same opportunities, whether that’s in high school or college, to be educated." ~Angela Ruggiero 

Take the OPPORTUNITY to read literature, watch media and ask questions to educate yourself on the benefits of Title IX. Here's a start...

"As Title IX turns 40, women and men tell of opportunity, acceptance, intangible benefits" article from Washington Post with quote 

"Sporting Chance" Trailer

A lot of good messages about the evolution of OPPORTUNITY in education and athletics.

Be Present. Be Happy. Be Passionate. Be Successful.

You determine your own fate. You are in the driver's seat. Take the wheel. Steer yourself to happiness and success. Be present in the moment. Enjoy the experience. When you hit a speed bump, do not stop. Continue to follow the path the living the good life. 

"My philosophy is that not only are you responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you I the best place for the next moment." ~Oprah

Passion and success should be intertwined in living the good life. Pursuing your passion defines your happiness. Your happiness defines your holistic and personal success. If 

'you are on the road to success,' you are living the good life. 

"Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you." ~Oprah

"You know you are on the road to success if you would do your job, and not be paid for it." ~Oprah

"To Thine Own Self Be True"

I'm lucky enough to be in a position that allows me to 'keep it real' in all aspects of my life. I'm blessed to work with young adults as they navigate the opportunity to explore and define who they are as they become independent individuals and interdependent members of society. Part of interacting with these young adults is have 'life' conversations. I can say without a doubt, we 'keep it real' when we talk about life. 
After two days of similar 'life' conversations, I was reminded of two overarching themes that sprinkle my daily interactions. The first, be true to you. The second, fear. 
With the first theme, the key is not being afraid to hide who you are. You should be proud to share your values and goals. You should have confidence in your opinions and emotions. Internal complexities and struggles complicate self-identity. 
Fear is multidimensional. Primarily, fear of the unknown, while fear of judgement and support also having major influences. So much is unknown. Not knowing exactly what YOU want. Not knowing how your decision will evolve and affect your future. Not knowing if others will have the reaction you most desire. Not knowing if you will end up hurt or happy. Not knowing. After struggling with the questions of the unknown, you still have to grapple with questions of judgement and support. Will others think less of me for the decisions I've made for MY happiness, passion and goals? I care about the opinion and support of others. Will they stand by my side as I make these decisions that are 'right' for me 'right' now? Then to compound the weight already on your shoulders, you have the countless thoughts running through your head how the different answers to all these questions will create varying situations you will have to react to in the moment. It is the complexities created by external sources that complicate fear.
Life is not simple. You do not learn by taking the easy path. Take a leap of faith to live a good life, a life of adventure, exclamation and enthusiasm. Embrace life and maximize your happiness by being true to yourself.  

"Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it." 

"We all have a fear of the unknown what one does with that fear will make all the difference in the world." ~Lillian Russell 

"Growth means change and change involves risk, stepping from the known to the unknown." 

"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do." ~Eleanor Roosevelt "A dream is your creative vision for your life in the future. You must break out of your current comfort zone and become comfortable with the unfamiliar and the unknown." ~Denis Waitley 

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." ~Dr. Seuss

Define Your Own Success

We don't learn from always succeeding the first time.  What we perceive as failure is often just a short term set-back that is the greatest learning tool.  Define your own success by learning from what caused you to get 'knocked down'.  You've only failed if you don't 'get back up' and try again. 

Living the Good Life: Defined Direction

After a little reflection, I realized my moral compass has already been calibrated based on set parameters. I have already spent the time to thoughtfully consider the framework that define how I live a good life. My "Essential Eleven"* are a seven elements of "Defined Direction."

Living the Good Life: Defined Direction

Trust.            

Confidence in others. Developed and maintained through honesty and integrity. Often times you cannot have trust without respect and also cannot have respect without trust. The greater trust someone has in you, the greater your ability to positively impact others. And, others have a great trust in you display passion. 

Integrity. 

Consistency in character and honesty. Continually acting according to values, beliefs and principles. Serves as a cornerstone for trust. 

Influence. 

Ability to positively impact others'. Strive each and every day to have a positive impact on others. Your influence may help others to make a positive change, accept an unsettling reality, and live their good life.  

Optimism.

Having a positive outlook helps you to have a greater positive impact on others. Yes, there is complete merit in being honest about the realities. I live in a world of realities and it's often my job to provide a reality check. But, someone has to be optimistic. You might be the only person that is optimistic about a situation and gives hope to someone who is dependent on your influence. Also, the more positive your outlook, the happier you'll be. 

Respect. 

Respect for yourself and for others. You do not have the right to respect; you must earn it. If you first respect yourself, then others will follow suit. Respect is not defined by being liked; you can be revered with great respect by someone who does not 'like' you, your personality, beliefs, etc. 

Passion. 

Find true happiness in your actions and interactions. Be passionate about your life and relationships. How can you have a positive impact on those you interact with if you're not passionate about your time with them -- even if only brief moments? Be passionate about your life's work. Find something that makes you happy and work at it, then it won't really seen like 'work' or a 'job.' If you are passionate about your 'job,' you will be able to have a greater influence on others. 

Family. 

Blood and marriage do not define family. You can have multiple families whose relationships are defined differently. There are many types of love, and anyone you care about, you love. You still love people even if they frustrate you, make you angry, or upset you. Anyone you love is part of your family. Your family changes as you change. As we move through life, our family grows. Love has no capacity and neither does our family. Often times our 'friends' compose one or more of our 'families.

*The "Essential Eleven" define Aseem Rastogi's moral compass.  

Moral Compass: Essential Eleven by Aseem Rastogi

I recently attended the NCAA Student-Athlete Affairs Education & Training Symposium. I like to refer to it as NCAA ETS for short. We opened our 3 days of programming with a dynamic speaker, Felicia Allen Hall. She discussed our moral compass and challenged us to purposefully define our own. Her example was the "Essential Eleven" that create Aseem Rastogi's moral compass. (The PDF she sent us with the info is attached as an image below.)

My articulated moral compass is a work in progress to be shared soon. 

Felicia ended an email she sent to attendees today with the following inspirational quote and empowering message. 

"British Prime Minister, Benjamin Disraeli believed that “the greatest good you can do for another isn’t just to share to your riches with him but also to reveal to him his own.”

Your student-athletes will go further in life if someone they respect believes that more is possible.  Help them stretch their thinking by stretching yours."

For those whose passion is student-athlete development, these words not only cause reflection but the need to take action. The question is... how will you stretch your thinking?

Unrelated, Yet Intertwined in Living the Good Life

"Live your life as an exclamation not as an explanation." ~Jackson Brown Jr.

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." ~Helen Keller

"Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

So many thoughts, words and actions within our lives begin unrelated, but are ultimately linked together. Branding and social networking are unique discussions had often times with no correlation to one another. As became evident through my reflection yesterday, the two directly influence one another. The above quotes are another example of the unrelated being ultimately linked. Three randomly generated quotes are relevant to living, experiencing and enjoying the same life. 

Among other messages, these quotes express the following:

Be bold. Be passionate. Be an individual. 

Don't sit on the sideline; join the team. Experience life outside the safe zone. Expand your horizons.

Pursue your dreams and goals passionately and wholeheartedly. 

All unique messages. All messages intertwined in living the good life. 

We should not live life in CYA* mode at all times. Our words and actions should demonstrate our passion and our individuality. We should be adventurous, as well as brave enough to be ourselves. By following these principles, we will live life as an exclamation. 

Part of being a role model, leader, contributor and teammate is experience not just examination. If our only experience is from the sideline, we cannot maximize the value of our contribution. Join the team. Make life interactive. Enjoy the ride. Two of the greatest 'teachers' are the unknown and failure. We learn from every opportunity that doesn't have clearly defined instructions. Sometimes the best instruction is step outside the box, dare to try our best and learn from our mistakes. If we choose to experience and not just examine, our life becomes a daring adventure. 

If we do not rejoice in our accomplishments, what is the benefit? If we do not have passion for our goals and dreams, will we ever truly accomplish anything worthwhile? If we fail, we must fail enthusiastically. We will benefit from our failures if we're invested in learning from the experience. If we succeed, we must celebrate our success. Celebrate those that help us reach our goals and dreams. Be passionate. Use passion and celebration to achieve enthusiastically. 

Living the good life is achieved through actively following your unique path with passion. We must dare to join the team to actively participate in our life's experiences. We must commit our self emotionally to experience the enthusiasm of life and power of passion. We must be willing to be unique by not suppressing our individuality to think like, act like, talk like others. We learn from each other because we are all different with unique perspectives. 

Often times, many separate experiences, actions, thoughts, discussions, and words share a common link. Lessons are learned and continue to evolve as elements of our lives compound. As elements of our lives compound, they become intertwined.

*CYA: 'Cover your a**'; One of many favorite professional environment acronyms; Most frequently used the describe the practice of documenting sometimes as a priority greater than in-person conversations that build rapport and non-verbal communication key in understanding messages and their reception. 

An InspiRAEtion Change

A little change to Living the Good Life... a commitment to inspiRAEtion. 

I've always loved quotes and the reflection they allow. There's more than one person that can attest to that. I also think a journal, blog, etc is a good way to 'release' thoughts, even if disconnected, to synthesis, process and move forward all at the same time. Something else I love... learning. I am most definitely a life-long learner. 

I recently attended several conferences... THREE within a month! At one conference the Ripples Guy spoke to all the student-athlete affairs professional present at the NCAA ETS. One thing core to his ripple effect and presentations are the Ripples quote cards. Something I do already is a twist on this concept. I also did a little Google and youTube searching as well to find a "Ripple Rangers" video filmed by RAs at one unversity. The combination of these two gave me some much needed inspiration to commit time to something I already enjoy and incorporate it into programming I'm already facilitating. 

CMU Ripple Rangers Video

Ripples Project Website

A couple other important foundational concepts and discussions focused on during the conferences I recently attended... BRANDING and SOCIAL NETWORKING. Branding... the organizations we're all committed to are branded. Working for an atheltic department that functions within a unveristy adds layers to the branding. We also have a personal brand. What we say, do, post online and share with anyone creates our personal brand and also reflects on the brands of the organizations we function within. Social networking is a powerful tool. Yes, it can harm you if you're not careful what information, photos, etc you're posting. Yes, it can also be the best tool in positively branding yourself and promoting your passions and commitments. If you're not branding yourself, you're allowing others to brand you. Another key element to understand... if you're not using social networking, you're not relevant. If you're not relevant, what is your value? Use social networking to make yourself relevant and valuable, as well as to determine your brand. 

(Another thing... how can you expect to make an impact, be influential and connect if you're not on others level?! If the people you're trying to connect with live and die by social media, you best as well be partaking. If there's a standard and 'appropriate' ettiquette you want others to follow through social networking, be the one to set a positive example!)

The first piece of my commitment for a positive change... a 'rebranding' of sorts through a little revamping of the blog title. I've added "InspiRAEtion." It's something I'm committed to and I will continue. I'm committed to posting something relevant to inspiration whether it's quotes, photos, reflection, etc on a regular basis. My reasonable goal is once per week (with some 'other' posts smattered in there too).

The next piece... it's something I've pondered many, many times. I just wasn't sure how to pursue my ideas. Here's my plan and commitment. I'm going to have a daily quote in my office... "Daily InspiRAEtion." I'll pre-make a bunch of printed quotes so I can randomly pick one and post it for the day. But, as new quotes find there way to me I'll add those into the mix too. 

The third element is incorporating inspiration into programming I'm already doing. Similar to the Ripples quote cards I'm going to do an activity with my students. The catchy title might change, but for now I'll refer to them as "InspiRAEtion Cards." I'll start with the SAMs and see how it goes. Then, maybe I'll add in SAAC and Connections students. I'm going to print "InspiRAEtion" cards that have a quote on one side. I'll make the students exchange and then discuss with a partner how it's relevant to them. I also want to print extra cards to keep in my office. If someone comes in for a C2J (Come to Jesus meeting) for whatever reason they might end up leaving with a quote to reflect on. Some people won't be too keen on these ideas, but then others will thrive thru the experience. Time will tell how it works and I'll learn as I go. Good news is I have a couple months to prepare this before we get rolling with the Fall semester.